Question:

I love the idea of my two children being my teachers. I am intrigued by your comment about ‘noticing what is right for them, not what is good for them’. How do I make the difference. I am not sure I can at this point. If they are fighting with one another – I see this as not ‘good’ for them as they might get hurt but if this is what they are choosing, is it right for them?

Answer:

Your kids are on their own journey here, exploring and experiencing from their unique perspective. They have a similar perspective to yours as you have taught them about their reality, but they also have their own perspective, as they are individuals with different ideas and thoughts and desires. Kids come into this world with a higher vibration than what you had when you came. The Earth is continually raising her vibration, just as you are, and so the entities that come onto Earth has to match her vibration. This means that the kids that come today have a slightly higher vibration than those who came a week ago. In addition to this fact, your kids have had less years in your society to get their inner knowledge “messed up” by the societal rules, which means they still retain some of this inner wisdom about how to live according to the Universal laws.

Your kids have emotions, and they go through manifestation events just like you. Sometimes they fight, sometimes they are best friends. This is them testing out the boundaries and the connections in their relationships. They are testing out their own limits and each others. They are teaching each other how to relate to people. They are also learning how to process and deal with their emotions.

You don’t want them to fight because fighting makes you feel bad. You worry they might get hurt, because them being in pain would make you feel bad. You worry other people will judge you as a bad mother because you can’t stop your kids from fighting. You worry they will create a bad feeling mood in the house and this will affect you so you will feel bad. You feel bad when they fight because you have been taught and believe they should not fight. You have been taught they should control themselves and their emotions. Fighting seem like giving in and losing control, and losing control is bad, isn’t it? We say it is not. Emotions are there to be felt. If they are fighting they are both vibrating in a match to a fight. If one is the victim and the other the bully, they are vibrating these roles and this is a part of what they came to explore.

If there was no judgement for fighting, if no one thought you were a bad mom for them fighting, would you still be bothered by it? Assuming they are not trying to kill each other for real, of course. That would be a rational fear, if they have guns and knives. Your kids are playing out roles in their relationship, and the effect it has on you is a part of your manifestation events to make you find your limiting beliefs around this. Do you care about what others think? If so, why? You are all equally good and worthy, you are all unlimited love, and what others see when they look at you is a reflection of themselves. They can never see the real you, so whatever they judge in you is their own reflection.

We understand you don’t want your kids to get hurt by their fighting, but is this a real fear or is it the fear of being a “bad mom”? Your kids will figure out how to deal with these fights and the feelings that come up. Remember they chose each other before incarnating. They chose this bond and this connection, and now they are living it out. It might be better if they didn’t fight, or it might not. The “lessons” they learn from the fighting, the beliefs they create about themselves and their world based on this fighting will launch them on a path of exploration that is unique and specific to them. What if one is meant to be a world famous boxer? What if one is meant to be a UN Peace-maker?

Noting is inherently good or bad, it is all just experiences. Your understanding and feelings around a situation is very different from your kids. You might worry about the fighting for hours, and they maybe forget it as soon as it is over. The actions that are played out in the now create desires that will create a different and new now next. You cannot possibly know what their now leads to or what they desire out of this. You don’t know what they have chosen to explore. But they are not wrong, either of them, and neither are you.

You want them to be a certain way because you believe that is the best way for them to be. But what if it isn’t? Can you allow them to be who they are, even if it is not who you think they should be? That is unconditional love.

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