People’s reaction to you is not you. They react based on their own perspectives and perceptions, so their reaction will always be about them, not you. The way you perceive and react to their show of emotions, to their reaction, is your responsibility.
When you perceive people to react negatively to you, you assume you have done something wrong. Even when you are able to convince yourself you have not done anything wrong, you still take on the blame for their reaction. What you need to understand is that you might be a trigger in their reality, just as they trigger you with their reaction. You teach each other. You don’t need to know what you teach them, you simply need to learn to not base your own feelings on other people’s reactions to you. Their feelings = their responsibility. If you can separate your own thoughts about you from the way other people react to you, you will find a more balanced way of being among other people. You don’t need to find out what they are reflecting back to you, you simply need to know that they are seeing their own reflection in you and so all you need to take care of is how you react to them.
If you can separate yourself from their image of you and also their reaction to you, you will find freedom of expression. You choose how you see yourself regardless of what is reflected back to you. This discord in reflection will only be for a short while, as your perception needs time to adjust to this new image. For that is what you are creating here, an image. Remember that you can never be defined, so any reaction from the outside world is also not defining you. It is simply there. It is simply your choice of perception. So in that sense it is even less real, as your choice of perception instantly changes what it is.
All your power is in your perception. Your identity is separate from how others choose to see you. Their view of you is fleeting, forever changing, and very individual. They see themselves and you see you. For a time, you will have to sit with this knowledge without them being included in these teachings. That is also an experience that gives room for expansion. Can you allow them to judge you without you needing to make them wrong? Can you allow others to live with the same insecurities you once had and not try to make them understand your perspective so as to get them to see you how you see you? Can you allow others to see you in the way that is serving them, rather than how you want to be seen?
Their reactions are a mirror yes, but only a mirror of your perception, not of who you really are. Their reactions show you what you SEE. If you change how you judge their reactions you will be able to accept them as they are. If you can allow them to judge you (what you perceive as judgement) without trying to prove they are wrong, and without thinking their reactions says anything about you, you will set yourself free from the chains of others opinions. Let them see you as they need to see you. Allow them to feel negatively towards you. Let those feelings flow through you without sticking to you. Let it go and don’t attach any meaning to it. It just is. You know you are beyond definition. Do not let others momentary definitions limit your expression.